土曜日, 10月 07, 2006
My typical day job is to socialize with all these people. Some people think it's cool, I think it's interesting, challenging and intoxicating at times. But I choose to be everybody's wind beneath their wings, I guess I like playing it that way. I don't need to get all the attention, a strange thing to say for someone who's always been under 'scrutiny' and 'limelight'. I am no celebrity but people love talking about me. My fashion, my career, my lovelife. Should I be flattered? To a certain extent I am but I'd rather be invisible. I'd rather wear a mask than expose my deepest feelings to everyone. I believe it's what they call self-preservation. I'm now struggling against depression. After tomorrow's biz trip, I will be taking the rest of October off, I need time away for myself. HB is hanging in there with me. We also have our problems to deal with. I feel guilty giving him all these worries but he wouldn't allow me to feel that way, we share the burdens together. I'm praying to God that we overcome all these trials and I've been praying for peace. HB has been very patient with me. He's always worried about me. We've talked things through and he supports my plan to resign. He knows that my physical and mental health is at stake.
I met with my agent today and he's told me about the BMW offer. It's a little bit more than what I receive now plus a BMW to drive. Quite exciting huh! But the offer is 1M short of my asking, so I told my agent Mark that I don't want to negotiate. He'll work this one out as I fly to the US. I guess it's good new, then...
Who knows what lies at the end of the rainbow but first things first. We have to move on, no matter how difficult the days are, to get to the end. But angels do really come to our rescue. Mark has been my newest angel, he's a nice person and I guess I'm lucky that the first agent I spent time on is with him. I'm not sure about the BMW offer, it's actually in Chiba. So I'm on the let's wait and see mode.
# posted by Unknown : 4:38 午後
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